Planning a wedding can be fun, interesting, and a bit stressful. And trying to figure out what’s appropriate and what’s not can be a bit overwhelming, for any couple. And when most wedding advice is geared toward a bride and groom, it can be confusing for a same-sex couple.
Here are the top tips Eden Florist offers from years of helping same-sex couples plan their perfect wedding:
1. Your wedding, your way. It’s your wedding. That means you can do it your way… if you want a more traditional wedding with someone giving someone (or both) away, do it. If, on the other hand, you prefer to have a wedding that is more meaningful to both of you personally, it’s your wedding.
Today when people attend a wedding (gay or straight), they don’t have the same expectations about what’s traditional, normal, proper. In fact, most people expect weddings to be more entertaining, fun and filled with personal touches that make each one unique.
2. The Wedding Party. Instead of maids of honor or best men, your wedding attendant can be anything you want. A man of honor or best woman is perfectly acceptable. You can even make up names for your wedding party – something that adds even more character and uniqueness to your big day. If you prefer, you can even opt to not have attendants. After all, it’s your big day.
3. Planning your Wedding Attire. For guys it’s probably simpler. Getting married in a more formal setting, tuxedos and suits are perfectly fine. Getting married on the beach, then tropical shirts and light colored slacks work. For gals, it gets more complicated. One or both brides may want to wear a wedding gown. In which case going dress shopping can be fun and a little complex. Traditionally the brides don’t want one another to see their dress. That’s why it’s important to have a third party with you, such as a mom (or both), a sister or trusted friends who have some fashion sense. That person or persons is going to help you find dresses that complement one another. No dress? Then it gets more complicated. You might opt for something custom made that reflects your taste and personality.
4. Go Online. Check out pinterest, the knot or other online resources for ideas. Create your own wedding vision boards with ideas you like. The bigger challenge will be in what not to include when the time comes. Follow wedding guides on Instagram.
5. Walking down the aisle. Who goes first? Who waits at the altar? These are questions for any same-sex couple. If you want to walk down the aisle together, do it. If you want to walk down separate aisles, do it. If you want someone to walk you down the aisle decide who will go first and so on.
6. Find the Right Wedding Planner. Just because it’s legal to get married in all 50 states, does not mean that all wedding planners support same-sex weddings. Do your homework. Check out planners’ social media posts. See if she or he has worked with same-sex couples before. Interview wedding planners to find out what their beliefs are and if they are capable of helping you plan your big day. Let potential planners know your partner is of the same sex. It is better to work with wedding planners who don’t have personal biases or don’t let those biases interfere with your wedding plans.